I don’t know exactly where to start this post… We talked about it throughout my MTW trainings and fellow missionaries have told me the day would come. I guess I didn’t think it would come as soon as 4 months into my time here. But it has… people I’m ministering to have let me down. Sin has roared it’s ugly head and some dear people I have ministered to are entangled in satan’s lies.
Maybe it shouldn’t hurt so bad or I shouldn’t feel as betrayed, after all I have only been here 4 months. Yet, my heart has already grown to love these people so much. Through each walk through the valley, each cup of coke, each chat, every game of soccer, and every prayer – I have been able to love and be loved on by the dear Nicaraguan people. By His grace, I have already been able to invest into a lot of people in these first four months.
I think what hurts the most is knowing how devastating and far the fallout of sin reaches. Systems are broken. Families are broken. Individuals are broken. And our relationship with God is broken. The effects of sin are so widespread. I praise the Lord that we are not stuck with the brokenness as what is permanent in life, but that the permanent is yet to come. That Jesus is still on His throne and He desires to save all. One day King Jesus will reign and right all the wrong. Our hope is in the Lord, not in this world.
Yet now, I live in the in between. I live in between what our Lord has already done and how He is present and at work now, but has not yet established His reign on earth. Death is at work in this world… yet, so is The Light. We live in between the already and the not yet.
What should we do then in this place? especially when we feel the effects of sin so deeply? Guard our hearts from hurt? Be careful who we minister to or show love towards? Be choosey to whom we show mercy and grace? No. I believe we are called to love despite what inevitably will happen – hurt. We are called to love and show mercy especially when it’s tough. We serve a God who is love and with the God of love in us, we too can be love and life to those around us.
My heart breaks for the brokenness I have already encountered in my short time here. I am saddened by the deep rooted cultural sins I see and the darkness that surrounds me. Yet, I look to our God and King who pursues me and brings healing to my brokeness and I know He pursues those here in this valley too. I am brought to my knees in prayer often as I feel the realness of the spiritual battle we are facing… and I trust Him. I lean deep into His promises and know He is working to bring life and light to every corner of the world. And I praise Him for every sliver of life and light I see piercing through the darkness.
Praise be to His glorious Name.
May you too be found to be light, life and love to the hurting and broken world around you. Even though darkness might seem to overcome momentarily, we know in the end it looses because the King of Light has already come into the world to set the captives free.
Seeking that there may be No Person Without Hope with you,